Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Morning conversation

C: Mom, do have ashes for people too? Like with the dog. [Our dog passed away over the summer and when he asked what they were doing with her body, I explained what cremation is.]

M: Well, yes. Some people choose to be cremated rather than buried.

C: When I grow up, I would like to have your ashes. I would keep them somewhere very special.

M: ...........Er, thanks?

I guess it is sort of sweet.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Send prayers and good vibes...

...to this sweet baby girl: http://www.lilyanncarr.blogspot.com/.

She is the daughter of a friend of a friend. She was born prematurely and then her mommy had to go to heaven. A truly sad, sad story, but I guess God always leaves a silver lining.


So I have been out with a guy named Chris several times, and I actually think there could be something here. He is a few years older than me. His family owns a mechanical engineering company that he works at. He is SUCH a gentleman, and practically runs ahead of me to make sure that he can hold the door open. It's little things like that that I think are huge in relationships. He has a close family and understands that I can't go out with him whenever we want because Corbin is my priority. It's not just about getting a babysitter, it's about wanting to spend time with him. He also understands that I am a firm believer in not dragging your children into your dating life. I do not bring guys I am dating around Corbin. I would hate for him to get attached and then heartbroken when a break up occurs. I am still trying to navigate the whole dating thing (even though Corbin is 8!). I just haven't really dated a lot.

Fingers crossed!

Please say a quick prayer for my sister. She is having surgery tomorrow to have her defibulator replaced. I am keeping Carson and Michael tomorrow night so that she can rest without worrying about the kids. It is a pretty routine procedure.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Two random thoughts

1. For some reason the connection between my computer and printer was lost, and I can't find the CD from the printer. I think I can install it by downloading from the internet, but haven't had time to mess with it. Any suggestions?

2. I don't know what it is, but I keep catching a scent in my house that reminds me of the baby days. I can't pin point it (but don't worry, it's not urine or poop). But man is it making me want to hold a baby (I won't say have a baby because that would be a sure sign that I need to be committed). See mom of the octuplets? Just because you want babies around doesn't mean you have them! Just borrow a friend's for a day. Or go rock some drug addicted babies. If I had 14 children ever in my life, God had better send them each with a bottle of Jack Daniels.

That's all.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Keeping busy

I am officially freelancing for an agency I used to work with in one of my former positions. It is going well, but I am still figuring out how to balance it with looking for a full time job. I am very greatful to have some actual work to keep me busy (and keep me working in the field). I also had a networking meeting with someone last week, and he was fabulous. He had a few minor suggestions for my resume, and some great contacts.

I feel like part of the real world again! My situation is not solved, but it doesn't seem as bad as I though it was.

Heading to the gym for a quick workout. Have a good day!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

My First Heartbreak

When I was younger, I was head over heels for Corey Feldman.

While most girls were dreaming of Corey Haim, I preferred Feldman. I think he seemed a little more attainable. Like maybe one day, when all of the girls were rushing to his friend, Feldman would look across the room and see me...and know that I would be with him always. Even though I was ten.

In those days, I constantly read Teen Beat, tearing out the pin up posters of eighties heartthrobs and taping them to my closet doors. One could say I was a little boy crazy, but my heart belonged to Corey.

Then, one day while listening to the radio, I heard the report that Corey Feldman had been arrested for drug possession. What?! My future husband would NOT do drugs.

My diary entry from that fateful day (I recently found my old diary):
I just heard on the news that Corey Feldman was arrested for drugs. This cannot be true. He doesn't do drugs. Corey Haim does drugs. I read somewhere that they had a fight. I bet this is his way of getting even. He put his drugs in Corey F.'s car and called the police. There you have it. I hate Corey Haim. Corey Feldman is INNOCENT. He DOES NOT do drugs!!!

Little dramatic?

Anyway, after several days, I came to the realization that this was true, and that the person I intended to spend my life with was a druggie. I guess this was a blessing in disguise. I was forced at an early age to learn that you can't help someone who won't help himself. And sometimes you have to let a person go and see if they come back to you. I still remember taking the pictures of him off my closet door. I even saved them for a while, along with other momentos. When I was ready to let go, I piled them in a trash can and watched them burn, a la Jeff Daniels in "Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael."*

My Corey never did show up on my door step. But he got clean, and that is what matters.

*Parts of this story may have been exaggerated to increase dramatic value